Tuesday, 11 September 2012

A response to Caetextia theory: how awareness of the role of context can give insight into the behaviour of loved ones

We regularly receive emails giving feedback on the expectation fulfilment theory of dreaming and caetextia theory from interested readers of our various websites.

Today we'd like to share (having obtained permission) this email from someone who read our Caetextia website and gained insight into the behaviours of their loved ones:
I came across your site on Caetextia a couple of weeks ago, the examples illustrated really resonated with me. I have gone through an awkward year realising all three of my children have the Aspergers quirks. As a result I have been reading extensively on the topic, looking at myself, my origins, my husband and his relatives.

The example of a man only brushing the front of his hair struck a chord with me. My mother who is a very attractive lady would always apply make up to her face, wouldn't even be seen in the garden without make up, but would leave the back of her hair looking like a birds nest. I have been puzzled at this behaviour until now, it all makes sense.

Equally the example of the educated man 'just following the instruction' re: eating the chocolate box. My husband will more often than not leap up to one of the childrens requests without screening or checking for appropriateness, etc - he then claims "but they asked me to".

I can see now that when parenting and communicating with my husband and extended family, I have to spend extra time explaining context and giving tangible examples that they can relate to.

Interestingly, I can now rewind moments in my past where I have felt the incredible lack of empathy shown by family and apply caetextia to the situation and understand where the lack of appropriate response comes from 'root cause analysis' if you will. This has been hugely beneficial to me just having an explanation.

This is a very unscientific comment to make given Aspergers seems to be pinned on many things including modern day life: environmental factors, food, leaky gut etc. Looking around at the quirks in my family I can see a very strong genetic link. My Uncle was a nuclear physicist for starters. Here is a quote from my great-grandfathers obituary:
"He was ever frank and outspoken in his opinions without fear or favour sometimes to his own disadvantage. Those who knew him slightly found him acid in his conversation to the point of churlishness but it did not take long to see that this was the hard shelled exterior of the typical lowland Scot."

It seems in the past 'aspie' quirks were pinned on cultural identity, more accepted as an alternate personality type.

Keep up the good work.

Understanding how the brain operates in Aspergers is unlocking a key to a very complex puzzle. Caetextia has just simplified that complexity for me.
We welcome feedback. There is a contact email address from both our dreaming and caetextia websites so please do get in touch if you have any comments or questions.

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